By Dr Kouser Fathima for TwoCircles.net
Many Muslim women are against the Triple Talaq , Around 50 thousand women have signed a petition asking for legal ban against Triple Talaq . According to survey by Bhartiya Muslim Mahila Andolan (BMMA) more than 90% women want an end to this practice. The campaign by these women is commendable but what is noticeable is the silence of most Muslim men on the topic of Triple Talaq . Many men do ascertain that the practice is unislamic, bad for the Muslim society but are not very vocal about their thoughts.
The discussions on Triple Talaq is usually muffled , in close circles but even men who strongly disagree are seldom vocal about it in public. The Men may not support the practice but their silence is taken as a indirect endorsement of the Triple Talaq . The silence of Muslim men is creating a vacuum which is used by so called ‘Muslim reformers ‘ who use the situation to attack Muslims.
No reform is possible until both the genders actively work for it, the struggle of women can be made easier only if the men actively campaign against the practice .
Sati and child marriage were identified by educated Hindu Men as social evils, they were the ones who first spoke against it, campaigned against it. Sadly similar attitude among Muslim men is lacking.
The common reasons given are “we don’t endorse or practice it,” “such incidents are few and are only hyped by the media,” or “Doesn’t happen in our family or social circles.”
These are lame excuses which indirectly empower the actual Muslim men who use Triple Talaq. No denying that women are the main victims but the fact is whole family gets affected by it, children been the worst victims . Shahryar Banu and Afreen ‘s cases are some of the few cases that are highlighted by the media but there are lot more cases which are unreported. Most cases of Triple Talaq cases are accompanied with domestic violence and abuse , and the voices of Victims is either unheard or stifled. Very few cases make it to the media and the so called ‘Muslim reformers ‘ grab the opportunity to further their agenda .
When women of your community are victims and are struggling how can the men remain mere spectators ?? Don’t they have responsibility towards them and their issues ?? What makes them turn blind to the sufferings of their sisters and daughters ??
Except for for few many turn into apologist and worst are those who further justify the practice, try to discredit the women. Few men who speak against it are called names and silenced. If only the men would stand with their Muslim sisters in their struggle, it would be a different story. Ironically many men jump to defend Polygamy as personal right even if they don’t practice but are silent on the issue of Triple Talaq .
Merely saying Triple Talaq is unislamic won’t solve the issue, strong-worded condemnation of the practice is need of the hour .
Muslim men repeatedly needs to reminded that the Triple Talaq is unislamic, they need to abandon the practice, respect and protect women’s right. Issuing Talaq is one go or saying it on phone are not only unislamic but also shameful practices that need to be discontinued. The role of men in the reforms will be new benchmark for future generations, reforms within the society are the best answer to the propoganda of portraying Muslim women as slaves and victims. If you can protest against these comments you also need to speak against the practice and stand with the women in their struggle against Triple Talaq .
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Dr Kouser Fathima is a Bengaluru based writer. She can be reached at twitter @drkf_18